OK - last chapter of the employment biography summarises what I've learned from the first seven chapters and gives some advice for the future. Here are the main conclusions of my biography, and the advice that came out of them. Advice is in bold typeface.
It appears, that I tend to disagree with my superiors, to the point of conflict. I do this because I am not only convinced that I am right, I am driven by this conviction. I have a tendency to be paranoid, and I don't understand what other people are thinking.
There has never been and will never be a simple fix to my challenges.
In the future I must talk with everybody and complain to nobody.
Everybody are fallible, also managers. Learn to live with it.
I will not be promoted. Forget about it.
I should use my husband and my internet groups, perhaps my blogs, to convey my frustrations, keep them away from work.
I recharge myself using statistical software and spreadsheets at work, and cooking at home. I know that I have to use recharging as a coping strategy. If I sense a conflict at work, or there may be too much socialising, noise, meetings or other sources of sensory overload, I have to find the time to work with a data set or else go home and make coq au vin.
I only need to make the amount of money I did in the job before my previous job, which is about $1,800 less (before tax) a month than I do now. That extra money is nice, but not in any way necessary.
What should I do about meltdowns? I should accept that there is a risk that I will face a meltdown, and if I feel it approaching, I promise myself to try and take a walk.
I must pick my battles. Carefully.
I can't and shall not try to change my manager. He is not changable.
I must remember to check up on my conversation partner, in order to avoid them losing interest.
When I am depressed, I take a pessimistic view on everything and I have no energy.
I think I appear (physical appearance) OK. I shower every day, change my clothes every second day, and I rarely wear clothes that are visibly torn or broken. But I always wear the same type of clothes. I asked my husband about my grooming habits but he only pointed out that I look very nice with scarves. In which case I think my grooming habits do not constitute a serious problem :)
Question to self: Do I monitor my emotions? Can I? How? (this must be my homework...)
I ask for help or advice, when I know whom to ask, and in particular when I need practical help. I am afraid of appearing stupid (not that I was ever considered stupid, I don't know why I am so afraid of this) and therefore I tend not to ask about more fundamental problems.
I need to relax about asking for help.
Showing posts with label employment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label employment. Show all posts
Sunday, 5 January 2014
Thursday, 26 December 2013
Intelligence and learning styles
The third chapter of the employment biography is about learning styles. But it is also about intelligences. The book lists the eight different intelligences, and the reader is asked to relate to these:
1. The logical/mathematical intelligence - this is where I am quite strong. I work with data, numbers, statistics, and I am quite good at it.
2. The interpersonal/social intelligence - if it involves me, I am rather poor in this field.
3. Kinesthetic intelligence/gut feeling. I do have gut feeling, but I think it is biased. I think my own anxiety towards certain situations pollute my gut feeling.
4. The musical/rhytmic intelligence. No. Not me...
5. The intrapersonal/analytical intelligence - this one is my strongest. I am very good at analysis, both within my field of work, but also of relations, situations etc., unless of course they involve myself, cf. above. The author of the employment workbook entitles this intelligence 'introvert', and states that people that are strong in this field don't work well in teams (that would be me, too).
6. The linguistic/verbal intelligence. If the analytical intelligence is my best and the mathematical my second best, this would be my number three. I am rather good at putting my thoughts into words, preferably written words. That said, I am often told that I use very few words. I provide information on a strict need-to-know basis.
7. The visual/spatial intelligence. I think this must be my number four, I am visually oriented, and I am better at finding my way than the prejudice against my gender dictates I would be. I look at a map, transform it into 3D inside my head and find my way, almost every time. Unless of course I am given oral instructions such as 'at the gas station, go left, and immediately after, go right'. These things are impossible for me to transform into 3D, and I get lost, because I can't visualise it. The visual intelligence is also about thinking in images. And I don't do that often. In particular, I am not very fond of metaphors. I rarely use them myself, and I get very irritated when others (over)use metaphors.
8. The natural intelligence - I wrote: 'something about animals and plants' in my notebook. Well, no. I like cats and dogs etc., but I am not particularly interested in animals, and don't consider myself intelligent in this natural sense. Even less for plants. I don't own potted plants (because we have a cat...) and plants are only interesting for eating.
As for learning styles, I have established long ago, that I strongly favour the visual learning style. If I need to understand something, I have to read it. I remember pictures much better that things that are told to me. I remember faces but not names. The biography goes a step further than establishing one of four learning styles, though. I had to review the tasks I had in the three jobs and describe how I learned to do these tasks.
Overall, I go about my tasks (including learning them) systematically. I keep a sense of perspective, while still focusing on details. This combination of seeing both the wood and the trees is one of my strongest competences in my job.
I ask for help (a lot) when I need to learn something new, at least if I know whom to ask. However asking for help is not very wise, because the help I get is almost always in the form of oral advise, which I forget within minutes.
I imitate others (another survival strategy) and I am often inspired by others.
It is easy for me to understand computer programmes and written instructions.
In two areas: Teaching and networking, I rely on my gut feeling. My intuition is very good as long as it doesn't involve myself.
1. The logical/mathematical intelligence - this is where I am quite strong. I work with data, numbers, statistics, and I am quite good at it.
2. The interpersonal/social intelligence - if it involves me, I am rather poor in this field.
3. Kinesthetic intelligence/gut feeling. I do have gut feeling, but I think it is biased. I think my own anxiety towards certain situations pollute my gut feeling.
4. The musical/rhytmic intelligence. No. Not me...
5. The intrapersonal/analytical intelligence - this one is my strongest. I am very good at analysis, both within my field of work, but also of relations, situations etc., unless of course they involve myself, cf. above. The author of the employment workbook entitles this intelligence 'introvert', and states that people that are strong in this field don't work well in teams (that would be me, too).
6. The linguistic/verbal intelligence. If the analytical intelligence is my best and the mathematical my second best, this would be my number three. I am rather good at putting my thoughts into words, preferably written words. That said, I am often told that I use very few words. I provide information on a strict need-to-know basis.
7. The visual/spatial intelligence. I think this must be my number four, I am visually oriented, and I am better at finding my way than the prejudice against my gender dictates I would be. I look at a map, transform it into 3D inside my head and find my way, almost every time. Unless of course I am given oral instructions such as 'at the gas station, go left, and immediately after, go right'. These things are impossible for me to transform into 3D, and I get lost, because I can't visualise it. The visual intelligence is also about thinking in images. And I don't do that often. In particular, I am not very fond of metaphors. I rarely use them myself, and I get very irritated when others (over)use metaphors.
8. The natural intelligence - I wrote: 'something about animals and plants' in my notebook. Well, no. I like cats and dogs etc., but I am not particularly interested in animals, and don't consider myself intelligent in this natural sense. Even less for plants. I don't own potted plants (because we have a cat...) and plants are only interesting for eating.
As for learning styles, I have established long ago, that I strongly favour the visual learning style. If I need to understand something, I have to read it. I remember pictures much better that things that are told to me. I remember faces but not names. The biography goes a step further than establishing one of four learning styles, though. I had to review the tasks I had in the three jobs and describe how I learned to do these tasks.
Overall, I go about my tasks (including learning them) systematically. I keep a sense of perspective, while still focusing on details. This combination of seeing both the wood and the trees is one of my strongest competences in my job.
I ask for help (a lot) when I need to learn something new, at least if I know whom to ask. However asking for help is not very wise, because the help I get is almost always in the form of oral advise, which I forget within minutes.
I imitate others (another survival strategy) and I am often inspired by others.
It is easy for me to understand computer programmes and written instructions.
In two areas: Teaching and networking, I rely on my gut feeling. My intuition is very good as long as it doesn't involve myself.
Sunday, 22 December 2013
My work-related social skills
As mentioned previously, I have completed the Asperger Syndrome Employment Workbook. The third part of the book (the biography) is divided into chapters. The first chapter contains a variety of facts about the three jobs described, I won't summarize that here, as its main purpose (for me at least) was to refresh my memory.
The second chapter is about social skills. Again, I had to go through the three selected jobs. The first job was my first job out of college, the second was a job I held 14 years ago, and the third is the job I am holding for another 9 days (a.k.a. my current job).
In my first job, almost 20 years ago, I was good at greeting, I was considerate of others, good at helping others and doing favours. I was good at offering thanks and at being honest/frank. My personal appearance was good, and so was my awareness of other's physical space. I was good at staying on a topic, including staying too long on a topic. I knew who to ask for help, and I was able to request change to conditions and procedures. I had a good choice of work associates.
On the other side of things, I was poor at showing respect to my superiors - they found me arrogant. My expression of emotion was poor, and biased towards negative emotions. I also had a poor awareness of how safe people felt around me. I failed everything in the not-so-honest department: social lies, making up stories, factual lies. My humour was poor (except with one co-worker who shared my interests). I had no physical contact with others, poor eye contact and voice level. My choice of words and phrases was poor. I was not good at knowing how and when to ask for help. My response to criticism was poor (and dramatic). I was poor at social conversations and discussion of personal and intimate matters, both during work and during breaks. My attitude fitted poorly in with others and I was poor at socialising both on and off the job. I had poor understanding of the unwritten rules and a poor etiquette of reporting problems.
Note about the social conversations: I managed to have lunch break with my co-workers every day for 14 months and I never uttered a word.
Six years later, in my second selected job, I had improved in showing emotions, my humour was better, my voice level had improved, and so had my ability to know how to ask for help. The most significant improvement was in the field of social conversations at work and during breaks. I did talk to my co-workers! The thing is, I am introvert and I feel insecure at times, but I am not actually shy. In my first job, however, I must have appeared very shy...
My last selected job, my current position, is difficult to describe using the book. Because it was almost two jobs. One before the merger and one after. In the category of asking for help, I found it easy to ask for help before the merger, while it became extremely difficult after. My own skills don't appear to have changed over the 14 years.
The impact of the merger on my ability to know how, when and who to ask for help is important in understanding my social skills, in particular my lack of social skills. It appears that my social skills are much better when I feel secure, when the workplace enables my social skills. When I fail socially, I fail because I am not in an enabling environment. So my social skills are not always poor, their weaknesses are only exposed by dysfunctional environments. This is a very important message to myself, also in my next job.
The second chapter is about social skills. Again, I had to go through the three selected jobs. The first job was my first job out of college, the second was a job I held 14 years ago, and the third is the job I am holding for another 9 days (a.k.a. my current job).
In my first job, almost 20 years ago, I was good at greeting, I was considerate of others, good at helping others and doing favours. I was good at offering thanks and at being honest/frank. My personal appearance was good, and so was my awareness of other's physical space. I was good at staying on a topic, including staying too long on a topic. I knew who to ask for help, and I was able to request change to conditions and procedures. I had a good choice of work associates.
On the other side of things, I was poor at showing respect to my superiors - they found me arrogant. My expression of emotion was poor, and biased towards negative emotions. I also had a poor awareness of how safe people felt around me. I failed everything in the not-so-honest department: social lies, making up stories, factual lies. My humour was poor (except with one co-worker who shared my interests). I had no physical contact with others, poor eye contact and voice level. My choice of words and phrases was poor. I was not good at knowing how and when to ask for help. My response to criticism was poor (and dramatic). I was poor at social conversations and discussion of personal and intimate matters, both during work and during breaks. My attitude fitted poorly in with others and I was poor at socialising both on and off the job. I had poor understanding of the unwritten rules and a poor etiquette of reporting problems.
Note about the social conversations: I managed to have lunch break with my co-workers every day for 14 months and I never uttered a word.
Six years later, in my second selected job, I had improved in showing emotions, my humour was better, my voice level had improved, and so had my ability to know how to ask for help. The most significant improvement was in the field of social conversations at work and during breaks. I did talk to my co-workers! The thing is, I am introvert and I feel insecure at times, but I am not actually shy. In my first job, however, I must have appeared very shy...
My last selected job, my current position, is difficult to describe using the book. Because it was almost two jobs. One before the merger and one after. In the category of asking for help, I found it easy to ask for help before the merger, while it became extremely difficult after. My own skills don't appear to have changed over the 14 years.
The impact of the merger on my ability to know how, when and who to ask for help is important in understanding my social skills, in particular my lack of social skills. It appears that my social skills are much better when I feel secure, when the workplace enables my social skills. When I fail socially, I fail because I am not in an enabling environment. So my social skills are not always poor, their weaknesses are only exposed by dysfunctional environments. This is a very important message to myself, also in my next job.
Sunday, 8 December 2013
Labour market issues
I've recently finished 'Asperger Syndrome Employment Workbook' by Roger N Meyer. My husband gave me the book because of some work-related challenges. These challenges have led to (another) job resignation. In January 2014 I'll start on my 9th (or 10th, depending on how you count) job since I finished university almost 20 years ago.
I found the book rather meticulous and I managed to get irritated a number of times about the very detailed instructions given. You have to buy a folder, some different coloured tabs, etc., and you have to organise your desktop in a specific way. The instructions are complete with drawings of the desktop.
I didn't do what the author told me to. Firstly, my 'Employment Workbook' was not a book but a kindle-book, and secondly I read in bed and thus had no desktop to organise. I wrote down all the answers in a notebook I kept next to my kindle. But I answered every question I could. In fact, it worked out just fine without folder, tabs and desktop :)
The main point is that you select three jobs, among these your latest job, and then you very meticulously go through these jobs. You answer questions about the physical environment, working hours, tasks that you did, etc. etc. I found this part annoying but anwered nevertheless. I have a university degree and I have been doing research for at least half of my career. Research is difficult to break into tasks and it felt like a waste of time. But it wasn't. Because recalling all the irrelevant details about my three selected jobs made me recall all the important things as well. The things that went wrong. And because I selected (as I was instructed to do) jobs from the beginning, the middle and the end (so far) of my career, I recalled things from the non-selected jobs in between as well.
Then, being in this state of remembering things that were long forgotten, you start writing small essays summing up learning styles, skills and talents, social skills, etc.
The last chapter sums up everything you've learned in a guide to yourself in future jobs. This part is the best, but can't really be done without doing all the previous chapters. So the book takes quite a while and there's no jumping to conclusions. But in fact, it's worth it.
Some time soon, I will summarise some of the chapters of my employment biography (which is what my notebook now contains) here.
I found the book rather meticulous and I managed to get irritated a number of times about the very detailed instructions given. You have to buy a folder, some different coloured tabs, etc., and you have to organise your desktop in a specific way. The instructions are complete with drawings of the desktop.
I didn't do what the author told me to. Firstly, my 'Employment Workbook' was not a book but a kindle-book, and secondly I read in bed and thus had no desktop to organise. I wrote down all the answers in a notebook I kept next to my kindle. But I answered every question I could. In fact, it worked out just fine without folder, tabs and desktop :)
The main point is that you select three jobs, among these your latest job, and then you very meticulously go through these jobs. You answer questions about the physical environment, working hours, tasks that you did, etc. etc. I found this part annoying but anwered nevertheless. I have a university degree and I have been doing research for at least half of my career. Research is difficult to break into tasks and it felt like a waste of time. But it wasn't. Because recalling all the irrelevant details about my three selected jobs made me recall all the important things as well. The things that went wrong. And because I selected (as I was instructed to do) jobs from the beginning, the middle and the end (so far) of my career, I recalled things from the non-selected jobs in between as well.
Then, being in this state of remembering things that were long forgotten, you start writing small essays summing up learning styles, skills and talents, social skills, etc.
The last chapter sums up everything you've learned in a guide to yourself in future jobs. This part is the best, but can't really be done without doing all the previous chapters. So the book takes quite a while and there's no jumping to conclusions. But in fact, it's worth it.
Some time soon, I will summarise some of the chapters of my employment biography (which is what my notebook now contains) here.
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